A man walked past his son's bedroom , he saw to his horror that his bed was nicely made and everything was cleaned up too perfectly.
He walked into his room and saw an envelope on his pillow. "For dad" it said. He opened the envelope with a strange feeling and shaking hands.
With pain in my heart I write you this letter. I ran away from home along with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with you and Mom. Her name is Stacy, I'm crazy about her and she is so sweet. But I knew you would not approve her by her tattoos, piercings, tight motorcycle clothing and because she is so much older than me. But I am not only in love with her, Dad. We are also expecting a baby! Our happiness just doesn't stop. After our first child we would like to build the biggest possible family. She has a trailer in the woods and there is enough firewood for the entire winter. Thanks to Stacy, I realize that marijuana actually isn't bad for you at all, so we decided that we can start a small plantation together. We will use this weed to exchange it with all the cocaine and ecstasy we want with other people in the communion. Meanwhile, we hope the science finds a cure for AIDS so Stacy will get better soon. She is so sweet, she really deserves it.
Do not worry Dad, I'm fifteen years and I know by now how to take care of myself. One day we will come back to to visit you, so you will get to know all your grandchildren.
Love, your son,
Dad, none of this is true, of course, I'm just at Jason's place. I just wanted to help you remember that there are worse things in life than my grades on the kitchen table. Call me when it's safe to come home!